Greetings from Russia! There’s too much to write to make it elegant, so here’s a sort of free-form/train of thought email. Every morning I wake up I’m out of my comfort zone…talk about an energy burner. But it’s definitely getting better and I’m settling in. There are hills everywhere – steep ones that are a part of every sojourn and begin to haunt your dreams.:) Small and steep stairs in desperate need of repair lead you up to every level of the city, which is essentially built on the side of a mountain overlooking a bay of the Sea of Japan. Really beautiful views when the sun hits the water. Dirt paths wind through the city hills as shortcuts – convenient but beware when they lead you to a street you have to cross b/c I’ve never seen anything as dangerous and chaotic as these roads and the drivers, not even in NYC or Rome…it’s a free for all, and you have to dodge other drivers and huge potholes, all at a crazy rate of speed! Try riding the bus, standing, holding grocery bags and the handrail above!! One cool thing is you can “hail” a cab here anywhere and a cab can be anyone with a car … really, it’s an accepted mode of transportation, and there is a different sign if you have money or if you are just asking for a ride; i.e., hitchhiking. Don’t worry, I don’t foresee doing either alone. I cannot underestimate the amount of walking we do – more than 20 hilly miles the first 4 days I was here (psychotic after flying for 19 hours!) and I’ve discovered that this is not uncommon. The way to the Church is straight up, or add on a mile to take the “gradual” road. I used to go up the muddy path that leads through the old pig farm and past that neighborhood’s outhouses. Now I prefer the steeper back way that is a worker’s “road” and takes me to the site of the new rectory and office building. 7 days a week it has smiling Chinese workers jumping all over the roof. Their bobbing heads and big grins have many a day been the only smiles I’ve received, and so the joy it brings me to hike the hill and greet them cannot be measured!
I guess that leads me to the Russian people here in Vladivostok. I have certainly never experienced anything like it, and now that I’m over jetlag and have made some friends, I can write with charity. 🙂 Historically this is a hard land in every way. Now, with their still very new way of life after the fall of the Soviet union, they seem to live as though at any moment everything could be taken from them, and there is a distrust and disinterest that seems to permeate everything. As the norm, there is no such thing as customer service, even with the introduction of privately owned stores. Even just common courtesy is hard to come by, and even some of the Russians here (especially those who have traveled a lot) say that there is a rudeness and unhappiness here that they did not find in other “hard lands.” So, when are you coming to visit? 🙂 They joke that I could never be mistaken for one of them b/c I smile too much while I’m walking and my hair is its natural color. 🙂 That said, of COURSE there are exceptions, and I’ve met some wonderful Russians who are welcoming and warm and humorous, and the babushkas get excited when I learn new words and say I must stay in Russia. Oh, one more thing … contrary to popular belief, almost everyone here has jeans, sneakers, and a cell phone. As a matter of fact, b/c it’s all so new, many who live in what we might consider unbearable conditions, typically spend their salary on fancy shoes, beer, cigarettes, and nice clothes. Part of it is that the buildings here – and especially the plumbing – are in such poor condition that even the amount of combined salaries in a family can’t change much. There’s also the mentality of spend it now while you have it before things change, but also just a contentment with difficult things. What these people have been through both before and after the Soviets is mind-boggling. When we see something that makes us shake our heads in awe … like an old woman hiking up these hills carrying a heavy sack and slipping on rocks … we use (in a Russian accent) what has become our favorite saying … “after all, this is Russia!” It’s very common for families to all live together in a small apartment. Even for the ones who are “doing well” there will be someone who sleeps on the couch in the kitchen, some in the bedroom, someone on the living room couch, and another on the pullout chair. And to give you an idea, in 3 weeks I’ve had no hot water 5 times, and as of yesterday, no electricity 6 times. And often it’s citywide! A lot of pre-Soviet homes and servants’ houses have been turned into apts and in both it is such that some have bathrooms and some don’t. People walk to the buildings where they work or to the community outhouses. There is such a state of disrepair here in what was once obviously a prestigious and beautiful city, that it will take many years for this society to rebuild. So, now after a month, that’s my impression of Vladivostok. 🙂
As for the different ministries here, I’ll just say that we were somewhat misled as to the church’s actual involvement. I have only been able to go to the orphanage once a week and wasn’t able to help with the street kids at all until I was finally able to set up a meeting with the woman who runs the organization there. I have just been trying to acclimate to everything, keep busy going to the hospice (nursing home) learning the city, finding and now studying with a tutor etc. … There is so much need here but we are basically left on our own to establish some type of schedule for ourselves with other organizations, and nothing like that is easy in Russia. It is hard for me to talk about the hospice and orphanage. The hospice is a narrow building that’s part of a regular hospital. From the outside, it could be mistaken for an old maintenance building, and inside is unbelievable. These elderly patients are all terminal and have been basically abandoned. Because their care is not paid for by family, the conditions are horrible. The staff do their best, but there are huge holes in the rotting floor covered by boards, 2 bathrooms for the whole place, and those worse than any gas station you’ve ever seen. There are patients lying on cots in the hall and a good room has 2 or 3 people in very shabby conditions, and there aren’t enough wheel chairs or walkers. There isn’t much for them to eat, and although it’s heart-wrenching to see, it doesn’t seem to phase most of them too much. For many it isn’t much different than the way they lived before they got sick. The worst part, like anywhere, is really just the lack of value for human life. It breaks my heart to hear about their families who have essentially left them there to die. The old ladies sit with their arms around you, and the old men hold and kiss your hands (it’s not a custom here) in gratitude when you leave. The orphanage is easier in that the conditions are better. The 1st day I went I held little Sasha for almost the whole time. She is about 10 mos. old and I was ready that day to take her home. The main 2 problems are that there aren’t enough arms to hold them all, and the corruption of the system, which runs very deep. For instance some directors pocket $ from adoptions instead of using it to buy diapers and other necessities. There are stories of the mafia and single mothers and children there not really being orphans but just taken to be “sold” in adoption to the U.S. type of thing … other horror stories too that I have no facts to substantiate. I am reading again a book steeped in Incarnational Theology and full of poetic imagery. The author is talking now about the countries that have been oppressed, and I read this at the perfect time, and it gave me great hope for what I am doing, and for Russia. She says: “The Nativity … takes place as it always has … Nowhere is there any visible sign of glory. [But, in these countries] Christ will be born again … In any humble, frustrated life, Christ may be born. It may be that in the heart of an old peasant, who has lost all his sons, the Divine Son will be born, and the old man will be made new, and his life will renew the earth. It may be that in the life of some forgotten prisoner, the Incarnation will take place, and the country’s life will begin again. It may be that in the soul of a hungry little child the Light that illuminates the whole world will begin to shine in darkness … [And] because in every town and village and hamlet of the world there are those who have surrendered their lives to the Host-life, who have made their offering daily, from the small grains of the common life, a miracle of Love is happening all the time everywhere. The Holy Spirit is descending upon the world. There is Incarnation everywhere – everywhere the Infant Christ is born; every day the Infant Christ makes the world new.” [Caryll Houselander, The Passion of the Infant Christ (New York: Sheed & Ward, 1949). Reprinted with title Wood of the Cradle, Wood of the Cross: The Little Way of the Infant Jesus (Manchester NH: Sophia Institute Press, 1995).]
On a very happy note, I am teaching an English “Speaking” course to university students at Caritas, which serves as a woman’s center and young adult outreach/evangelization center. I teach beginners and advanced 2 nights a week and really love my students. It’s so difficult, though, and I wake up at night with lesson plans running through my head:) There are many working here at the center and the church who are very well-read and a lot of “intellectuals” but also poets and musicians, so in that sense I am very much at home, and we have great conversations about philosophy, Theology and art. Of course if I make it out of here without taking up smoking again it will be a miracle … I’ve never seen so many smokers. The diet here is lots of dough with stuff like “meat,” potato, cabbage, or cottage cheese with some strange fruit … yeah, bought that one by mistake one time! 🙂 So, dough, beer, bread … I’ve taken to guzzling vast amounts of vodka and wine just to be sure I’m getting enough carbs in my diet:) Thankfully there are lots of farmer’s markets and the Chinese market where you can get fresh vegetables, and most everything else. You can find “American” things but they are in really funny packages, and the writing obviously makes them look so different. Also nothing except peanut M&M’s and Coca Cola lite (diet coke) tastes the same. It’s no big deal not to shower often and people will wear the same clothes days in a row and no one cares … yes I may stay forever! 🙂 I am sooo happy to report that as of today (as I write) I am now established with the program for street kids and I have been cleared to come to the orphanage 2 days a week. This is great headway. Today I met the head caregiver for the orphanage ward of children’s hospital #3. She was very kind and I have great hope now that a good relationship has been established. Once I learn more Russian I think she’ll let me come whenever I want. I also went for the 1st time with the mobile soup kitchen to feed the street kids. I wish you could see them! Some are more hardened of course and look at you warily, but these are the very ones that make you want to be trustworthy so that they will open up to you and you can show them love. You can tell they are really not so tough and they are kind when they ask for another bowl of soup or more bread (pronounced Hlep) There are 3 stops and it is every night. Then 3 nights a week the center is open from 4 – 9pm where they can come for food, clothes, books, games etc. … Ok, so that’s it and next time I promise it won’t be so long … just too much to take in all at once, and you all have had so many questions from the food to the city to the ministries! I move into the apt. with Myra (the volunteer from Canada) this week so will finally be settled. I send my love and prayers to you all and hope all is well on your end. You can fill me in on things as I am always able to read emails, just don’t usually have time to write them. Also there’s always the snail mail route don’t forget!!
love, erin
p.s. well, we just had our first snowstorm, which they said even for them is freakish!! greeeaat! walking in a city on a hill, in the COLD, with the wind whipping up from the bay from the sea is spectacular lemme tell ya! It’s everything you think of Russia. The sun is out again though, so we have a reprieve, and they think winter isn’t really here yet … there’s still time for me to get out ha ha!!
